50 Shades of Cray

I’m typically a pretty chill person. I’m nice to people. I like to make people feel comfortable around me. If I say something that could be perceived as offensive, I’m quick to do damage control and offer my deepest regrets.

However, that’s a different shade of Fatima. That’s the non-pregnant me. Fat, aching, hormonal Fatima is a force to be reckoned with.

Seriously, I’ve become a monster. When I’m not out terrorizing the innocent, I just appear guano crazy.

For instance, I was shopping for maternity clothes at Ross. While flipping through the clothing on the rack , I catch in my periphery a woman who appears to be staring at me. A little socially awkward, I don’t look at her, but just strum up some conversation about how surprised I was to find some cute maternity clothes. She wasn’t amused, and kept staring and smiling.  Freaked out, I scooted to the end of the rack. I decided to be bold and look at her in a way to let her know that she’s creepy.

She was in fact a picture of a woman, a model, that was placed at the end of the rack in such a way that it looked like she was some big headed stalker.

Naturally I felt like a babbling moron, but fortunately only one person witnessed my one sided conversation with a poster.

Then there was the time I was watching Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood with my daughter, and cried the whole episode because it was about the arrival of Daniel’s new little sister. I sat on the couch with tears billowing down my cheeks. Big sister didn’t help because she just climbed in my lap and patted my leg. She takes very good care of me on crazy days.

The pinnacle of my craziness came when I was just innocently waiting in line at Starbucks trying to decide on whether or not to subject new baby to a few milligrams of caffeine or just go with a low fat steamer. Then I felt it. Someone’s breath on top of my head. I turned slightly to see if maybe it was air blowing out the vent. No. Instead it was a man that was about a foot and a half taller than me staring straight ahead with a book tucked under his left arm. I turned back around and took a step forward, trying not to infringe on the personal space of the patron in front of me because people who do that are as welcome as an abscessed molar.
He stepped up closer. I looked him in the face and gave him a district frown. Lurch kept looking forward.

Now I’m a small woman, but I don’t take kindly to being run over. So when I stepped up to place my order, and he scooted up so close that he was kind of standing beside/behind me, crazy pregnant me was unleashed. I whipped my hair back over my shoulder, slammed my wallet on the counter and asked him “have you seen 50 Shades of Grey? Because you’re about to see 50 shades of crazy if you don’t back off my heels.” Dumbfounded, he looked like he didn’t know whether to open his butt or scratch his wallet. I ordered a hot herbal tea, and was gone.

I pretty sure that my filter is busted, and that I’m not going to make it to end of this pregnancy without getting into a knock down, drag out fight with someone. It’ll probably some poor bystander who just glances at me, and because I don’t want anyone looking at me, he’ll get body slammed.


Pregnancy: The Sequel (16 Weeks)

16 weeks

How far along? 16 Weeks

Maternity clothes? Not in this pic. I can actually still wear most of my regular pants much to my surprise. I still prefer yoga pants.

Stretch marks? None.

Sleep: What is this?

Best moment this week: Spending a couple of days away with my husband for our anniversary.

Miss Anything?: Clear skin. Energy. Good moods.

Movement:Getting stronger every single day.

Food cravings: I petitioned my facebook friends to see if anyone knew where I could get my hands on some honey BBQ chicken nachos this week. One friend pointed me in the right direction, and they were soo good.

Anything making you queasy or sick? Not this week.

Gender: We find out soon!

Labor Signs:  So I’ve had a few contractions already. I started having Braxton Hicks pretty early last time, but this seems like it’s even earlier.

Belly Button in or out? In. My belly has barely popped.

Rings on or off? On.

Happy or Moody: Happy days are few and far between.

Reading: Articles here and there. I’ve been most interested in learning even more than I already know about vaccination in light of the measles outbreak.

I get to hear the baby’s heartbeat this week and get to find out if we’re having another miss or a mister.

Pregnancy:The Sequel (15 weeks)

15 weeks


How far along? 15 weeks

Maternity clothes? Not this photo. Obviously I’m wearing sweatpants though that I bought when I was pregnant last time.

Stretch marks? …

Sleep: Still popping the night time melatonin.

Best moment this week: Starting a new job.

Miss Anything?: Clear skin. Coffee.

Movement: SO MUCH.

This week I’ve felt a bit more sunny than usual. I attribute it to the stretch of warmish days we’ve had. Being able to actually go outside and play with big sister makes me feel much, much better.

My hip has been bothering me a lot this week, and it has made it very difficult for me to be active. The heavier big sister gets, and the larger my belly gets, the harder it becomes on me to lift her, and this really depresses me. She’s so active, and I want to be able to keep up with her.

Everyday this week I’ve had to slice up some potatoes and either pan fry them in olive oil or bake them and smother them in ketchup. I like ketchup OK, but this has been in excess. Also, every afternoon without fail, I have wanted a PB sandwich (yuck, no J) with a small glass of milk. These are pretty easy to manage.

I started a new job this week which is a huge blessing. The job that I’ve been doing for the last several months has been great, and I still do it, I just can’t do it as much. It requires a lot of lifting and preparation that my little body just can’t handle right now. My new job requires me sitting in front of my computer screen. I could do that on bed rest.

Even though I’ve felt a little more energetic this week, I’m still mostly exhausted. This pregnancy has been more challenging on my mind and body than the last, and at the end of the day I’m too tired to sleep. I usually have to take a melatonin to settle down. I’m getting a new all natural sleep aid in the mail this week that contains vegan melatonin, valerian root, chamomile, and a few other sleep encouraging herbs. Hopefully this will help.

My sweet husband has been so kind to rub my back and hip every single night, and I imagine this will be a routine that lasts throughout the remainder of this pregnancy.

There’s only 25 weeks left in this pregnancy and just over 2 before I get to find out if new baby is a boy or girl.

Pregnancy: The Sequel(12 Weeks)

12 weeks

How far along? 12 weeks

Maternity clothes? I’m wearing my new H&M maternity treggings which I will continue to wear postpartum and forever after because they are comfy AND cute. I bought another pair in a lighter shade, and I’ve been wearing them interchangeably for days. I figured I should wash them which left me with ugly maternity pants, yoga pants, or my old pre-baby jeans. I decided since winter has decided to arrive I needed something more than my beloved yoga pants so I reluctantly wore my normal jeans which much to my surprise still fit.

Stretch marks? My belly has barely popped so….

Sleep: Pregsomnia continues…

Best moment this week: Lot’s of big sister snuggles. She’s getting a mouthful of teeth, so she’s been super cuddly.

Miss Anything?: No so much.

Movement: A little flutter here and there. You CAN feel your baby before 13 weeks and NO it’s not gas.

I’m falling a little behind trying to keep up with this pregnancy. It’s hard because unlike last time, Monday soon becomes Friday without me even realizing it. I think that comes from the fact that I’m a SAHM who works for herself. I never know what day it is unless my husband is home, then I know it must be the weekend.

Here’s to a year of happy baby moments! Cheers!

Pregnancy: The Sequel (11 weeks)

11 weeks


How far along? 11 weeks

Total weight gain:Honestly, I have no idea. I have decided to not worry about weight gain this time around. I’m a healthy eater, and I exercise. I don’t want other pregnant readers to read my blog and compare themselves to me. If my doctor becomes concerned about it, then I will.

Maternity clothes? Not in this pic, but I wear yoga pants more often then not. I did order some super cute maternity jeans from H&M for $15! They were on sale after Christmas, and I could not resist. Word of wisdom for buying H&M Maternity jeans, buy 2 sizes up. I have some from my last pregnancy that I found at Goodwill that I almost didn’t buy because they weren’t my size, but I tried them on and they were so comfy. I love that the belly band on their pants comes up over the majority of your belly. I hate most maternity pants because they cut you off mid-uterus.

Stretch marks? My belly has barely popped so….

Sleep: I take chewable melatonin almost every night. I’m not a fan of having to take it, but I’m also not a fan of not sleeping.

Best moment this week: Waking up at 3 am on Christmas morning to feel my baby FLUTTER. No it was not gas, it was bubbly, fluttery, and consistent. So precious.

Miss Anything?: Not feeling like I’m sea sick

Movement: YES.

Food cravings: Sour candy. I need to hit up Trader Joe’s to see what they have in the sour candy department, because I try to avoid dyes and artificial flavors like the plague.

I’m a little delayed in writing this because of Christmas, but this week has been great overall. My belly feels like it has exploded, and feeling new baby flutter has me tickled pink.

I’m so thankful we got to spend time with family over the holidays, and I even got to eat SOME food. Thanksgiving meal was nothing but a plate full of mashed potatoes.

My husband and I began reading Christ Centered Childbirth this week. We read a bit of it last time, but we didn’t get it until I was almost 9 months pregnant, and I had already read        e v e r y   pregnancy book my small suburban library had to offer. The one thing that has stood out to me so far from my reading it to try to connect with the baby at the beginning of every hour by talking to, praying for, or just thinking about him or her. This is pretty hard for me, especially since I’m constantly chasing around big sister, but I try to take time throughout my day to do this.

Pregnancy:The Sequel (10 Weeks)

10weeks 10weeks2

How far along? 10 weeks

Total weight gain:Zero so far

Maternity clothes? Not in this pic.

Stretch marks? My belly hasn’t even grown yet.

Sleep: Pregnancy insomnia is a pain.

Best moment this week: Lots of snuggle time with Big Sister

Miss Anything?: Not feeling like I’m sea sick

Movement: Not yet!

Food cravings: Bring on the steak and taters!

Anything making you queasy or sick? This prune sized tenant.

My husband and I have been battling sickness for the last week. He had the stomach bug, while I had a touch of it. I’ve mostly felt flu like. I’ve had a fever most days and have just felt generally achy.

I have already paid a much needed visit to my chiropractor. My SI joint is already starting to contort horribly out of place, thanks hormones. I could lay on my stomach and feel my hips, and my right one jutted straight up in the air. He was able to remedy that pretty quickly, and I regained some much needed mobility. However, I don’t want to have to go to the Chiro every single week of this pregnancy so I Googled some physical therapy exercises for SI dysfunction. I’ve started doing these exercises, and I can tell a huge difference in the strength of my pelvis and back.

If you’re experiencing sharp pain beside the base of your spine, you could be having SI issues. These exercises are easy but effective. I use an old exercise band and one of my daughter’s small plastic toy balls.

I’m looking forward to documenting this journey and watching this little bump grow.

What were some things that were different about your subsequent pregnancies?

Baby Bump Progression Weeks 6-39

6-30weeks collageI always liked looking at other women’s baby bump pictures to see how beautifully their bodies transformed over the course of their pregnancy. Though pregnancy, for me, was rather uncomfortable at times, I never felt more at home in my own skin. I loved being pregnant, and I loved my enormous belly.

This collage features my belly starting at 6 weeks pregnant all the way through my first week postpartum at 39 weeks.